Fiction: Legal Theft Project--Late Night Trip to IHOP

"You have sixty seconds to explain how this is not the best idea I've ever had.”  Julie bounced from foot to foot, making her ponytail swing from side to side.  Sophia found it hard not to be hypnotized from it.  But she gave herself a little shake and started with the short list of excuses.

“I've got a test on Monday."

"You mean the test you've been prepared for for weeks, and literally have your notes memorized for?  Doesn't count."

"That level of sugar and carbs is not healthy."
"You study two different forms of martial arts, and you go to the gym five times a week. You can afford to be a little unhealthy now and again. Doesn't count."

"It's a waste of money."

“My treat.  Doesn't count."

Sophia had run out of reasons, and Julie knew it.  Julie hummed the last few notes of the Final Jeopardy tune, punctuating each note with another little hop.  She made a very loud buzzer sound, and grinned.  "Time's Up!  Let's go.  You have exactly forty two seconds to put on real shoes, or I'm dragging you out in your slippers!  Let's go!"  Sophia sighed, smiled, and looked for her sneakers.  Julie was counting aloud, and she knew very well that when she hit forty-two, she would make good on that threat. 

The first line of this story was legally stolen from my dear friend Gwen. See what she did with the line I gave her today, and see what she originally wrote for this starting line tomorrow over at http://apprenticenevermaster.wordpress.com/.   <3

Confessions of an Extreme Introvert

One of my apartment mates, who is far more outgoing than I've ever been, has made very good friends with the people who live above and below us. She goes over to eat meals and watch movies with them relatively frequently.  I've always been invited, but rarely go. One day just after the big snow storm, I was invited to go eat breakfast, and bribed with bacon and a meal I wouldn't have to cook, I relented. One neighbor asked me why I didn't join them more often, to which I replied "I'm not very good at being social."  He sort of laughed and told me that it wasn't that hard. My reply: "You'd be surprised."

Before I go on anymore, I want to make it very clear that in this post I am only talking about myself. Anytime you try to split billions of people into only two categories, there are going to be variations in those categories, and some pretty extreme variations are possible when you're talking about literally half the world.  Some people might understand where I'm coming from, feeling similarly-- and others are going to think I'm absolutely insane. Either way--

Here's the truth of it all.  Every single social interaction I have drains me some.  Every single one. Even if it's a simple hello with a stranger on the street. Even if it's a three second conversation with my best friend. The trick, I've learned, is to just make sure not to let people see that it's draining.  For the most part, people don't like to think that they are being a burden.

Most of the time, they aren't.  I willing allow myself to be drained to do things with friends and family and other events that I believe will improve my life. I push myself to interact with people because it is very hard to get by in life without talking to anyone at any time.  I push myself to be around a hundred strangers for once in a life time events like seeing groups who barely ever go on tour, and standing next to the red carpet during movie premieres. (Although for that last one I was forced to abandon my spot near the railing before anyone good came around, because I just couldn't take it anymore.) But it takes a lot, a whole lot just to follow a day to day routine. With people I love and trust, it could take a day or two to drain me completely. With people I don't know, don't trust, and/or dislike, it can take as little as an hour.

When I'm running on empty, I go through three very distinct stages; Quiet, Loud, and Bad. Quiet comes first, and is actually a stage I enter relatively frequently. As you might assume, I get quiet. I don't participate as much, and I will even physically curl in on myself, crossing my arms, and tucking my chin down so I don't have to look people in the eyes.  If I am sitting down, I'll pull my legs to my chest.  It's around then that people start to ask me if I'm alright.  A headache makes for a good excuse for my silence, and a way to remove myself from the situation.  It's a good first stage and makes for a strong warning for what is about to come.  That's Loud.  I get angry, and then I get loud.  This is usually accompanied by yelling and slamming, whether that is things on a table or my bedroom door.  I'm not a fan of this phase, and I am most certainly not proud of it.  It has led to me yelling at teachers, bosses, and even worse, best friends and family members.  When I was younger, my mom had a name for this stage, though I don’t know if she realized it.  She named me "Addy" as in attitude, and would say things like "Tell Addy to go to her room and she can come back out when she's Rebekah again." But even still, Loud tends to get me sent away or causes people to leave me alone.  I almost never get to Bad.

Bad, much like Quiet and Loud, is named for what it is.  I don't like who I am when I get to Bad, which has only happened three times in my memory.  I do things I'm not proud of. I react in ways I shouldn't, and I think thoughts that are not good for anyone. You'll forgive me for not elaborating, I hope, because it's hard to think about and even harder to explain. 

I guess the point that I'm trying to make is: Yes, it can be very hard to be social.  There are people, or at least me, out there who find it very difficult to do something as simple as sit down and have a conversation over a meal, and they aren't necessarily able to explain exactly why it is so difficult for them. Keep in mind that they are keeping watch over their own energy stores, and when they want to flee, please don't keep them trapped, not if you can help it.  No one likes to get close to Bad.

<3

Traveling

I want to travel. More than anything else, I want to travel. If I suddenly got a hundred billion dollars, the first thing I would do would be to go everywhere that I've always wanted to go. I'd would later realize that it was in bad form to spend a hundred billion dollars traveling around without putting any of it into savings--or paying off those student loan things--but still.

 I want to go everywhere. And that's not an exaggeration. I want to cover as much ground as is physically possible. I want to see as much of this world as it is humanly possible for me to do so. I considered adding a list here that would be my "places to visit" list, but I just kept going and going and I would probably end up listing most of the major cities and countries on the earth.  And that might just take up more time and space than I'm willing to give tonight.

Needless to say--anyone willing to take me anywhere I've never been before, is my new best friend.

<3

Superheroes

Like many small children, I grew up with a fascination with superheroes. I watched an awful lot of cartoons, read a good handful of comic books, and more than once tied a sheet around my neck as a cape. I followed many a hero, but always held a special place in my heart for Superman. Briefly, I was disappointed to have both my parents and was not adopted because superheroes never got to keep both of their parents unless they were adopted. That was something I got over very quickly.  I was also disappointed that I wasn't the child of a billionaire that would allow me to develop a secret base with tons of cool toys to play with.   That is something I still haven't quite gotten over.

I wonder what would happen if superheroes suddenly appeared. How would we react if someone managed to defy science, physical capabilities, and the technology of the day, and run around ready to take care of the bad guys in the world?  I'm pretty sure that we'd try to kill him/her/it. Maybe that's cynical, but it's what I think is the most likely. I kind of wish it weren't true.   Maybe if the superhero worked with the police, we'd be okay with it-- I don't know.  I imagine we'd all be scared of it. After all, Superheroes and cops almost never get along.  So yeah, I'm pretty sure that we'd kill it dead as soon as we could. Shame.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'm going to go watch Tony Stark be snarky.

<3

Fiction: Legal Theft -- Childish Magic

"She has Merlin Sickness," Sally's mother said with a level of seriousness that her father never really understood.  Sally nodded serenely.

"Sounds serious." He raised an eyebrow, "Is it serious?"

"Oh, very serious."  Mother turned to Sally. "May I tell your father the nature of your disease?"

"He already knows," she grinned, "But I suppose he could forget soon."  Sally skipped around to the back of the couch, and disappeared behind it.

Her father watched where she had disappeared for a second, and then turned to his wife. "Kate. Our daughter is insane, isn't she?"

"Most likely. Do you want to hear about Merlin Sickness or not?"

He sank down onto the couch and put his arm around her shoulder. "Sure. I might as well figure out what my eight year old has contracted."

"Well, according to some versions of Arthurian Legend, Merlin was born an old man, and aged backwards through time. So hellos were bittersweet partings, and goodbyes were joyful connections.  She asked me about it, so we googled some stuff about it. The title Merlin Sickness came from TV Tropes. And Sally has determined that's what she's got."  Kate smiled at her husband as he blinked at her, trying to understand that.  He turned and looked over the back of the couch to where Sally was laying, staring up at the ceiling through a picture frame rectangle made from her thumbs and pointer fingers. 

"How long do we think this will last?"

"Mm, who knows?" Kate turned to look over the back of the couch as well, "She does really seem to like these legends, but she does always go back to Harry Potter in the end-- So I say a day or two until she's a witch again."

"Right."  Kate and Billy turned back to look at the room as a whole. They sat in silence for a moment before Billy laughed, "Arthurian Legend? Who gave her that?"

"You're the one who told her she could read anything on the bottom three shelves."

"Yes, but you're the one who insisted on teaching her to read in the first place. I was perfectly willing to just sell her off into indentured servitude to pay off some debts, but you were all like 'Billy! I want my only child to be ed-jum-mi-cated.'"

"I have never pronounced it like that in my entire life." She hit her husband gently on the stomach.  Billy laughed and leaned in to kiss his wife.  When he pulled back, Sally was standing in front of the couch, and unsharpened pencil pointed at his face.

"Petrificus Totalus!" Sally cried.

"Merlin Sickness over?" Billy asked.

"Daddy! That's the full body bind! You can't talk until I do the counter spell."

Billy turned to his wife, "You taught her to read."

"Merlin sickness over, baby?" Kate repeated.

"Yup. Harry asked Dumbledore to help me out. He's a nice guy like that."

"Harry? Or Dumbledore?"

Sally though that over for a moment, tapping on her chin with her pencil/wand before grinning, "Both!"

"Gotcha. Well, let's go practice those clean up Daddy's study spells before we un-paralyze him, huh?"

Kate and Sally skipped off to the back of the house, and Billy stretched out along the couch.  Well, as long as he was paralyzed, he might as well take a nap.  Besides, who knew what his daughter would be when he woke up.

<3

Fiction: Legal Theft -- Waiting at the Airport

It had been a year to the day since he last saw her, which was about a thousand days too long. He knew that as soon as she was offered the year internship abroad that she had to take it.  He also knew that since he only worked hourly at a book store, and that since her internship was only paid in room and board and work experience that it was very unlikely that either of them would have the disposable income to fly across the pond to see each other. He knew that it was going to be tough, and it was going to be long.  But he'd done it, he'd pulled through, and now she was whisking her way through the air, coming closer and closer to him with every passing moment.

It wouldn't be so bad if he was traveling to her.  He liked it when he was traveling to her. Because there were plans to be made and things to be packed and the constant worry in the back of his mind that he'd forgotten something important. And of course the constant vigilance for stupid drivers and/or terrorist plots and/or pickpockets and/or the old woman who wants to spend the entire plane/train ride telling him about all her grandchildren in extreme detail. Those things kept him busy, and would help keep him a little bit distracted. 

But when he was waiting for her--it was torture.  He'd already cleaned the house thoroughly, including changing the sheets, even though he knew she wasn't going to believe him and would change them again anyway. He'd decided to surprise her, and gotten the stuff she put in storage to be "out of his way" back into the house and into their old positions.  He'd mowed the lawn and weeded the garden, and then because he was on a roll, he mowed and weeded for the neighbors as well. He'd changed his clothes four times, trying to remember exactly which button up shirt she had said was her favorite, and then to prevent himself from doing anything else, gotten in the car and drove to the airport.

He now sat near the baggage claim because they wouldn't let him go any further--a full three and half hours before her flight was scheduled to arrive. If a year was a thousand days too long, then three hours was at least a year too long.  He knew one thing for a fact, after all of this--if she decided to leave the country again, he would most certainly be going with her.

The first line of this story was legally stolen from my dear friend Gwen. See what she did with the line I gave her today, and see what she originally wrote for this starting line tomorrow over at http://apprenticenevermaster.wordpress.com/.   <3

Bad Moods

Contrary to popular belief, I don’t like to be in a bad mood. I’ve never been a fan of being angry or of being grumpy. The worse kind of bad mood is the bad mood where nothing can be done about it.  Like, there are bad moods when you’re hungry, or bad moods when something doesn’t seem fair—but you can eat something, or use your anger to motivate you to make things right.  But when you’re just in a bad mood with no real reason, there is no real way to fix it.  You can try to disguise the bad mood, cover it up with things you enjoy and people you like, but the second there is a moment of silence, the bad mood is still lingering there—ready to remind you that something sucks.  The only thing to do is to wait it out, hope that it goes away sooner than later, and to keep yourself busy.  And if you’re really lucky, you’ll have some good friends who are willing to listen to you be unhappy for no reason—and they make you feel a little bit better.

<3 

The Name Game

So, almost two weeks ago, Emily U/B challenged us to pick our favorite boys and girls names for each letter of the alphabet.  I started my list on that day.  I’ve just now finished it, and that’s only because I’ve forced myself to buckle down and decide. I’m not very good at deciding on favorites, but I’ve managed to do it here.  I do, however, reserve the right to change my mind about any of these at any given moment. There are just so many good names out there.

A - Adam, Allison

B - Benjamin, Brynn

C - Carter, Cassandra

D - Daniel, Debra

E - Eoin, Elizabeth

F - Fredrick, Faye

G - Gregory, Gemma

H - Henry, Haley

I - Isaac, Isabel

J - James, Jillian

K - Kenneth, Kimberly

L - Liam, Lisbeth

M - Michael, Margaret

N - Nathan, Noelle

O - Oscar, Olivia

P - Paul, Patricia

Q - Quincy, Quinn

R - Robert, Ryann

S - Samuel, Sasha

T - Thomas, Thea

U - Ulrich, Ursula

V - Victor, Veronica

W - William, Willow

X - Xavier, Xandra

Y - Yale, Yvonne

Z - Zachary, Zia

So, there you go.  I’d be fascinated to hear everyone’s opinions and their own choices for favorite names. It’s hard but it is fun.

<3

If You Could Master Any Skill, What Would It Be?

If I could master any skill, it would easily be the ability to learn languages easily.  I’ve always been fascinated by other languages—well, really all languages. I’m fascinated enough by the nuances of the English language that I dedicated four years to studying them.  But I’ve always wanted to be bilingual, or tri-lingual, or any other lingual.

The only reason that I don’t know another language right now is because it takes time. I know that sounds like a petty excuse to not learn, but it’s not that I give up on learning, it’s that I change my mind.  I’m so indecisive, that I change my mind a hundred different times in the time it would take to learn a language, and I’m not very good at sitting still and picking one.  In just  the past year, I’ve looked up those self-teaching language software programs for Spanish, French, German, Welsh, Farsi, Scottish Gaelic, and Irish Gaelic. I’ve also flirted with the idea of returning to Latin which I studied in school ages ago, or convincing my ex-roommate to teach me Ancient Greek.  If it were up to me, I would learn all of these languages, and more as other languages inevitably strike my fancy.

The truth though? I couldn’t even master Pig Latin or Ubbi Dubbi as a child, and those are just variations of a language I already speak. I don’t have much hope for completely foreign languages.  Will that stop me? No, not really.  But I don’t have high expectations.

<3

The Most Amazing Room

A week or so ago, a prompt was presented about the perfect room, the most amazing room you could imagine. I sat down to try and write out my perfect room, and I couldn't.  It's a lot harder than I imagined trying to figure out exactly what I would want in a room.  I know for a fact it would have a desk, a comfortable chair, and probably a place to lay down and take a nap.  It would have books, but also a state of the art entertainment center including flat screen, top of the line sound system, an all-region DVD player, and every video game console I could even begin to wonder about.  I thought it might be a huge room, but then I thought that I like smaller spaces better, so maybe it'd be a small room, but then I'd want room to run around like an idiot, so maybe it better be bigger, or even multiple stories with stairs, but then slides might be fun, and wouldn't it be nice to have a fireman's pole to play on, and definitely one of those ladders that slide around on book shelves but then again would I want my bookcases to be so tall because I am short-- Yes, I went on like that for a very long time, trying to decide what would be perfect.

In the end, I realized someone had already created my perfect room.  J K Rowling came up with the idea and stuck it into the walls of Hogwarts. Really, what I want, is my very own Room of Requirement.  Whatever I need, whatever I want, it could be there with a thought.  And as my needs and desires change, I could head to that room and find it a completely different place, perfectly suited for what my mind wanted then. Wouldn't that be wonderful?

<3

Fiction: Legal Theft-- Calling Him Out

"You've already mapped out our whole relationship, haven't you?" Richard looked up from his notes and found Chrissy smiling at him. She was a friend of a friend kind of person, someone he'd known for a couple months now.

"I'm sorry?" He asked, not because he hadn't heard her, but because he needed time to come up with a response.

"You've realized that we get along. You've seen how we've been flirting.  You've sized me up in your head. You've determined what a happy honeymoon period we would have, and then you've theorized about hypothetical flaws in my personality that would drive you crazy, or what traits of your personality would drive me mad.  You've pictured a big break up for us, and ultimately decided 'What's the point?'  Am I hitting close to the mark here?" She said it all in a gentle, only slightly teasing way.

His silence and slightly guilty smile confirmed that she had hit a bulls eye.  She smiled just a little bit wider, and in spite of himself, he gave her a genuine smile back.  "Don't worry.  I may have done the same."  She sat down on the couch next to him, and patted him on the knee. "So, let's hear it.  What was my fatal flaw that ultimately lead to our relationships demise?"

"Uh, not yours, actually, but mine.  I was unwilling to be lenient on a cleaning system I had developed over the years.  When we moved in together, you just kept making small mistakes.  I started repeating the system in the way one might try to teach a child, to which you snapped and yelled "You're not my Mother" which lead to a bigger over all argument, which lead to you storming out leaving me once again alone and miserable."  He wasn't entirely sure why he was telling her all this, but he did feel comfortable doing so.

"Oh, very nice.  For the record, I will get mad if you treat me like a child, but also for the record, I only have to be taught something twice before I've got it committed to memory."

"Let's hear your version then,"  Richard reached out and patted Chrissy on the knee in a mimic, "What was it that lead to your version of our relationship's demise?"

"Not yours, but mine," She echoed, "I get into these moods, some days, where I don't want to be in a good mood and I don't want to be cheered up.  People can comfort me, if they want, but any active attempt to make me happy will be met with bitterness and rage. I've yet to meet anyone who could tolerate these moods for long, and in my head, you're no different.  Eventually, you get fed up and leave, and I have a proper reason to mope for days at a time."

"Hmm." He stroked his chin dramatically, and Chrissy laughed. "Well, I certainly understand those moods, I've been stuck by them.  I don't know how I would respond to being on the opposite side of that coin."

"So, shall we put our theories to the test?" She asked, jumping back up to her feet.

"What do you mean?"

"Are you going to ask me out for real? Or will this all remain purely hypothetical?"

He was quite for a moment, trying to decide what the right answer here was supposed to be.  Was she having him on, or did she genuinely want him to ask her out?

Finally, he decided to throw caution to the wind. "So, do you think it'd be alright if I took you out for dinner sometime this weekend?"

"I'd like that. You've got my number, give me a call."  She smiled and gave him a wink, before turning on her heel and skipping out of the room.

He smiled and looked back down at his notes before shaking his head and wondering aloud to himself, "What in the world have I gotten myself into?"

<3